Keep your foot hard on the pedal. Son, never mind them brakes

If the Bandit’s song was:

East bound and down, loaded up and truckin',
we're gonna do what they say can't be done.
We've got a long way to go and a short time to get there.
I'm east bound; just watch ol' "Bandit" run.

The NASCAR song should be:

Victory lane bound, driving round in circles
We’ll smoke cigs while Jr. gets er done
We got no where to go and a long race to get there
I’m Nascar bound, just watch that race car run!

Well, all I can say right now is been there done that, and I had the good sense to save my money and walk away without the t-shirt! I was all over the place this weekend, I had more plans than time but I definitely crossed a few things off my list. I’ll keep the items from Friday to myself for the time being, but I’ll share the rest.

Saturday I woke up and hurriedly pulled myself together, racing to get to see Elaine on time so I didn’t miss another hair appointment! I couldn’t wait one more minute. When I first walk into the shop, I usually get either a compliment about looking slim or a suggestion to lay off the bread. This time, it was a healthy diet tip! It amazes me what a difference 3 lbs makes to my beloved French Eliane! I sometimes feel like Andre Smith headed to NFL training camp! Just gotta loose some lbs before I get to training right? DOES this make any sense? No, I’m pretty sure it does not in my case, probably would have been a good plan for Andre though. Well, if Elaine ever goes to a NASCAR event, she might have a heart attack on the spot. I did witness a guy get winded just opening a beer! Too his credit it wasn’t a twist off.

Anyway, my hair was done and it looked lovely, but alas it took a while and I missed the window to get by Dragoncon, at the Civic Center. Dragoncon, btw, is a convention where the lovers of any or all things Scifi come by to share their passion though dress, parades and camaraderie. I was a little sad. I have wanted to go since I moved to Atlanta and after all, I AM dressing as an anime character for Halloween this year. If you have any idea what I am talking about, you can guess who!

So it time for phase 3, and I packed my bag and hit the road toward Hampton, GA for a few days at the Atlanta Motor Speedway with my buddies and girlfriend Jan. Her buddy Wyatt has an RV, as do his best buddies and they gather together at such events, form a compound, drink liquor and smoke cigars. I realized pretty quickly once I arrived that the next few days were going to be a little different from my typical weekend activity. –

***PAUSE for a quick second as I just noticed that Wyatt enters surgery in 5 minutes for a Stent to be implanted in his heart! Quick prayer, one for his quick recovery and a second as a thanks to God for making my friend too tough to be kept down long by such a thing***

So as Wyatt undergoes the knife, I continue to recall the events of two days prior. Saturday night, there is an evening race. 195 laps around a 1.5 mile track. I was kinda enjoying myself until I realized that the race was not going to end before the Alabama game started. I can’t miss the first game, people. Finally it ended and I got back in time to see Alabama tear into VT, actually VT was a pretty strong opponent but we did win in the end.

So, I find out the next day that the big race that evening at the Atlanta Motor Speedway is 325 laps. Do you have any idea how long that takes for cars, even at very high speeds, to travel in circles for 500 miles. - Hint, it’s a really long time - The most interesting part for me was watching the fans. At what seemed to me to be random times, some guy would jump up and start cheering for his driver, kinda like I would if I was hoping for Julio Jones to catch a TD pass! But there was no clear indication of a particular “race changing” event when the cheers erupted, just seemed like a spontaneous outburst. Honestly, im still confused about all that. I was ok until about lap 200 when I realized that they had 125 more to go. I was gonna be sitting there all night and I was not really sure why.

According to my friend Jan, this is the biggest spectator event in the USA. Seriously? I have decided that I like my roommate, BK’s, method of watching racing better. Sit on the couch, fall asleep, wake up for the last 50 laps. Or even better, just catch the highlights from Windtunnel on Sunday night.

What we want

SO, I just realized that finding a job is a lot like dating. You find something that looks interesting and you go on an interview, maybe you will like the person, maybe they will like you, who knows? There are zillions more people in that “organization” that you might or might not mesh with, but you by chance end up sitting across from that one in particular and what happens next is completely dependant on that interchange.

You talk a bit, chit chat . Tell them all your finest qualities, why you are the best “man” for the job. They tell you what all they have to offer and why you would be SO happy with them. The exchange ends, you share a parting gesture, and go about your way.

You drive away evaluating your thoughts. Was there an instant connection, a possible interest? Or was it a definite NO. This happens on both ends, of course.

Maybe you get a call back, a second interview. Maybe you go, maybe you don’t. It all depends. Sometimes you might already have a “job/significant other” to fall back on. Sometimes that is exactly what you are running from. Maybe you don’t really want a “new job” at all and you were just a little bored. Or you don’t have any leads at all right now and you are willing to take the chance on a maybe just to get out and try something new.

Maybe you get the "dream job" and quickly realize that dreams are better left in sleep.

OR . . . you just go back to the drawing board and wait for the perfect fit.

Does the desire for tolerance negate personal choice?

When did it become acceptable to be intolerant in the name of tolerance? We are getting to a place where we are so politically correct that honest opinions cannot be voiced without fear of retribution? Personal beliefs aside on the topic, I was impressed with Miss CA for honestly stating her opinion to an audience who clearly would not agree with her position. Is that not the definition of courage? She spoke from the heart and clearly differentiated her personal belief system from the expectation that she has for others. Is it asking too much to allow for personal choice in our super tolerant world? Will Perez Hilton call me an intolerant bitch if I say “yes I believe in a woman’s right to chose, but personally I could not terminate a pregnancy. “ Please tell me? Does that statement alone indicate that I care less for those in my life who might have made that choice? Am I backwards and intolerant because I believe that each individual should have the right to establish their own value system and live their life accordingly? What is nirvana for these people? Should we all think and say the same things all the time and live by the exact same value system? Is that the best way to establish a sound, productive society?

Our differences make us unique, as individuals and as a country. The ideal world for me preserves the characteristics in each of us that make us individuals while simultaneously respecting that not everyone is different. My professor Dr. Jagdish Sheth at Emory stated it in words that I have always respected and appreciated. “America is not a melting pot; we are a big salad bowl”. We are made up of all kinds of mixed lettuce, red tomatoes, green celery, orange carrots, everything that you can think of to throw on there and make it colorful and interesting. Imagine if you throw all that into a huge blender and make it homogenous. Who wants to live in a big pile of green goo?

Softened by the forced reflection that comes with loss

Recently a tragedy befell the family of a man I work with. We are not close personal friends, but I have shared a beer or to two and conversation with him on occasion at an off site and resultantly, I came to respect him. His son was engaged to be married within the year. His life plans were altered irrevocably when a drunk driver crossed the lane and killed his fiance in a collision.

I remember reading the note explaining the accident that was forwarded to those of us in the office who work with him. I read it and sat at my desk frozen for a moment in time. As I read and the terrible story unfolded, I could see his face in my mind like an old movie player, shaky and blurry with enormous pain in his eyes. He doesn’t typically show much emotion on his face, his countenance is quite temperate, and so as I imagined how he felt at that moment, I hurt and I cried for him.

I think of my family and how our lives changed the day Alex died. I’m sad that his son will not stand by his bride and pledge to spend his life with his love who he had known since childhood. I am sad for the parents of a young girl who lost their baby girl that day. I’m sad for my coworker because I imagine the helpless feeling of seeing your child in such pain as he struggles to recover from deep loss. Lastly although it is clouded with anger, I’m sad for the reckless driver who will live a life on this earth with the burden of having taken a life. He will surely face God with a heavy load to bear.

When I first hear about this type of tragedy, I go back to that moment on the beach when I first heard the news of my brother. I had gone out to dinner with my boyfriend’s family and afterward we were having a glass of champagne and quietly listening to sounds of the ocean. It was an incredibly peaceful moment; in hindsight, like a hush at the eye of a tornado.

I came through my experience with a greater appreciation for the people in my life. I do sometimes still think about what could have been, particularly at special events in my family’s life like my brother’s wedding. Alex would have stood beside Alan, at the birth Alan and Allison’s boys, every holiday really…. But now with the passage of time, I can look forward to what WILL BE and IS in all of our lives with tremendous thankfulness and hope. I look forward to all the gifts that life will hold because I know that is what Alex would want for all of us.

I heal with the peace of understanding that God has those I love and miss in his perfect care and I pray for God to ease the suffering and heal all broken hearts.